Stop complaining....

 

Have you ever thought of complaining as a habit? Complaining is actually an addictive behavior. One complaint leads to another and another. After enough complaints your mind begins to desire and crave those thoughts.

It's very similar to the way your body works with other things such as food, exercise and even drugs. If you eat healthy foods and exercise regularly your body will want more of that. If you eat junk food and your only exercise is pushing the buttons on the remote then your body will crave that as well.

How much more true is this for drugs and other stimulants? If you are used to a daily caffeine fix what happens when you skip a day or decide to go cold turkey? Your body will fight back, you will probably get headaches, you will be tired and grouchy and perhaps even get the shakes depending on how much your body craves the caffeine.

Complaining can actually become a habit that can get so bad that it can ruin relationships. If you make a habit of complaining you will find that people won't want to be around you. You might even find that you don't want to be around yourself.

If you have ever spent time with someone who makes a habit of complaining I'm sure that eventually you did not want to spend much time with them. I know that I don't enjoy spending time with people who want to find the one little thing to complain about in every situation that comes their way.

One problem that people run into with complaining is that they believe that they can't stop complaining. They hold one or more false beliefs:

* They believe that the way they see things is reality and that any other thinking is belittling

* They believe that they have no control over their thoughts

* They believe that they are stuck in this pattern and feel helpless to get out

The good news is that as with any other habit or addiction it can be beat! As with anything worthwhile it will take some effort but it will be well worth it! There was a point in my life when I was certainly a chronic complainer and it took effort and work but I can tell you without a doubt that it was more than worth it. I would not want to go back to my complaining mindset for anything! What a miserable place to be.

Steps to kick that habit to the curb:

1. Accept Responsibility for Your Thoughts. You are not a victim to your thoughts, they do not control you - you control them!

2. Call The Thoughts What They Are. As soon as you recognize a negative thought passing through your mind or your mouth stop and call it out as a negative or complaining thought. It will lose some power just by being named.

3. Throw Away Negative and Complaining Thoughts. After you have named the thought discard it and don't let it back into your mind even if it tries to come back, which it may very well do.

4. Replace it With a Positive Thought. The negative thoughts will have a much harder time returning if they have been replaced by something better. If it hasn't been replaced it may even come back with some of it's buddies giving you an even harder time.

5. Focus on the Positive Thoughts. Repeat them to yourself at least five times but as many times as necessary. Don't just say them once and think that you are done with that negative thought. You will really need to focus on them and you will need to believe them over the negative thoughts.

6. Keep Positive Thoughts Written Down. Be prepared! Write down some positive thoughts on note cards and keep them close by. You know what negative thoughts you struggle with the most, come up with positive thoughts that will fight the thoughts you know you struggle with the most.

7. Rinse and Repeat. Keep it up each and every time that you have a negative thought and complaint. Keep in mind that the hardest work will be at the beginning. Once you build this habit of positive thinking this whole process will become natural! That's when the hard work pays off!

You can do it! You can have all new thoughts and feel like a new person if you diligently follow these steps! Also, don't beat yourself up if you fail. Failure is not permanent. Dust yourself off and start over again!

M°